RoyalMom

My baby is three months old now, and I am the same weight I was when he was one month old. Leave it to the full length mirror in the hall, a warm day, and some shorts to shatter that cloud of denial I had going. The denial that supports my hunger for good food. The denial that likes to taunt my husband with comments like, "Don't ya just LOVE my Barbie gams?!!" or "The way my knees are hiding behind one huge fat pad is as cute as a cupie doll!"

Ai-yi-yi, WHY LORD, do I have to gain a whopping 80 freakin' pounds to have a baby?? And to all the women who told me it will burn right off after the baby, take a gander at my wide ass now! Now you can tell me it's all belly, and I'll appreciate your honesty. While I was pregnant it was a little hard to swallow, since I knew it was bullshit.

Royal Mom is getting serious now. No more denial, I'm putting it all out there. I'm even posting some before and after photos of my yo-yo diet called two pregnancies.

Before Baby #1 (barely, I was 6 weeks pregnant)

Six Weeks After Baby #1

One Year Later

Baby #2 "Barbie Gams"

So, goodbye my old friend Thai Orchid and your delicious Pad Thai noodles with the heavenly peanut sauce. Hello garden burger, sandwiched between two pieces of dry, low-calorie wheat bread, and all your un-delicious fiber.